This was a question asked in my kids wellbeing club this week. This is only the second term of my NEW breakfast clubs to help support children who find it tough to get into, stay in, and cope at school.
Many of the children have avoided the Aromatherapy essential oils we explore around the topic of 'being present'. I'd go as far as to say that they have shown aversion in the body language - pulling away from the bottle, grimacing, and an occasional 'yuck' sound! Yet when we categorise the oils into their groups of woody, herby, fresh, minty, floral, and citrus together I always share what an oil is capable of when they query the two oils I associate with this action of presence - Elemi & Helichrysum (Immortelle/Everlasting).
This session was the first time any child had said 'Claire what oil was it that you said would help me to 'be present'. Interestingly, I'd been asked about both of these oils on this day and I had explained the difference between the two aside from their distinct aromas that while both are 'curious-provoking' smells they sit in two very different groups - Elemi sits in the fresh category, while Helichrysum hangs out with the woody oils. The latter holds you deeply and firmly in the present without being able to remember your past, or look ahead, just be here! While on the other hand, Elemi is a 'lighter version that is a gentle stepping stone before Helichrysum. 'Which type of present oil would you like to return to?' I asked. She said 'the lighter one'. So, I located it and placed it in front of her nose, ready for her to lean into it when she was ready. She comfortably leaned in and her body language settled with the fresh, but gentle holding this scent provokes. She accepted the aroma and asked to keep smelling it.
This is such a special gift to witness when someone feels ready to explore something you have shared over time, as it feels so crucial to the process of your own personal self-care to reach for things at your pace, knowing that with patience you will get to the places you need to reach on your journey of healing.
Being present isn't easy, and cannot be forced, and needs to be offered as an invitation to explore when the person is ready. As with any learning if we can adapt to the pace of the individual it ensures a commitment from the learner to be open to what can be supported for them by doing so, it'll then be a two-way interaction.
Anxiety is a big factor to the many reasons why children attend the wellbeing breakfast club I offer. With anxiety comes an unsteadiness and resistance to trust what others say may help them. Of course we are all individual, our timing, requirements, and possible remedy will vary as any one label of a condition like anxiety is never experienced the same way by every person with it. An observation for me is that children require equilibrium first, a space of balance and ease before they can be present.
Do you currently avoid or find it hard to 'Be Present'? Try finding your place of harmony in a balanced state first. Perhaps exploring Palmarosa, Rose Geranium, Agnus Castus (Vitex Berry), Jasmine, Ylang Ylang, Vanilla, or Benzoin first. Check out my next blog before finding your presence.